First off, I work with great people and I'm pretty blessed with the company I have. I trust them, they are good at what they do. I wouldn't still be here if I didn't think so.
What's bothering me is that knowing myself, I tend to be pretty hard on me. I always have these ideals in my mind that most of the time, I get stuck on the things that I should do instead of actually doing them. That, coupled with the actual demands of the job make me a stressed little girl. What's wrong with this picture? I lead a team of people who are good at what they do- and I use the word lead loosely as I don't think am doing a good job out of it. I take feedback as it is and try to do something about it- you know how I hate not doing something about it-whatever that it is. I try to learn as I go along but there are just times I don't get it. I try to make my mark on things and try to do things the way I know. What is so frustrating is the doubt that I'm actually doing something right. I don't care for recognition, rewards will come sooner or later; I just want to get the job done. And why do I feel like I'm doing everything? Shouldn't a good leader be able to plan out everyone's work properly? Why do I think I'm doing this the wrong way? sigh.
Nobody warned me about this.
So there. I think I should learn to just let go of some things that I cannot do anything about and really just focus on what I can control. I think that the most responsible thing that one can ever do is to take care of yourself.
bahala na si batman. am thinking, thinking, nooneenoo.
kawawang batman. buti nalang may robin siya.
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