feeling lost even if i am home
seeing the truth, once again
even if i thought i've forgotten
how to
pushed back
in a place and time when
pain was more welcome
than pleasure
it feels like morning and midnight
all at the same time
it seems like you know
and see my soul
yet you choose not to recognize
it is knowing and thinking
and yet
not speaking of things
that we know as truth
and hide behind these masks
facades of joyful uncertainty
this, i know to be my truth
and my fallacy
my reality
until the time comes
for you to choose to stay
this is what
it feels like
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